And Then There Were Three!- Week 1

It's been a while since I have been able to update this blog because, as you can imagine, we have been quite busy. We welcomed our precious baby boy, Brody Lawrence Bish, a week ago  and his first week has been an eventful one.

Labor Day

Fair warning some of this may be TMI so if you want to skip ahead feel free. I'm not an overly reserved person when it comes to talking about this stuff so I'm going to lay it all out there. As much as I use this blog to inform others of our story, I also use it as my own form of therapy. 

Sunday July 7

We checked in at the hospital about 5 pm. Once I was all settled, a Dr came in and put a balloon in my cervix that would hopefully get dialation started. At my previous Dr.'s appointment I was already 2cm. In some women, this process may bring on contractions though that is not the intention. I was one of the lucky ones that started contractions. The contractions really picked up that night and I was in quite a bit of pain. Sleeping was not going to be an option. The nurse gave me a couple of rounds of pain meds, but Brody was not tolerating them well, so we decided to go ahead and get my epidural. This was a major cause of my anxiety. My back is very sensitive to touch. If you touch my back it sends a shiver up my spine that causes me to jump. I was terrified this was going to happen during my epidural and I was going to end up paralyzed. Maybe I was being a bit dramatic, but it was more of a fear of the unknown. So, about 1:30 am they came in and got things started. They made Trey leave the room and had me sit on the side of the bed squeezing a pillow. The first thing they did was give me a shot to numb the area. It really was not that bad, but I was fighting contractions the entire time I'm trying to stay still. My nurse was in front of me holding a monitor on my belly to monitor the heartbeat. She had me squeeze her arm as needed which I did a few times. I started to feel bad though, so I switched to massaging her arm.  Episdural process went well. I was feeling good and contractions seemed to calm down a little at that point. The goal was to try and get some sleep, but it was clear that was not going to happen. 

Monday, July 8

In the morning, my Dr. came to check on me. He took out the balloon and checked me and I was 3 almost 4 cm. dilated. I was bummed, but he seemed to think it was a good start. We started the Pitocin to bring on the contractions and thus the waiting game had begun. We would be monitoring his heart rate very closely. If there was any sign of distress we were off for a C-section. In the late morning, we started taking bets on what time he would  arrive and his size. I noticed an interesting expression on the nurses face when we were guessing afternoon. I asked her what she thought and all she said was "some time tonight." I didn't like that answer so much. I was already tired from not sleeping and was ready to get this show on the road. Also, I was always used to my sister's labor experiences which never lasted very long. So the wait continued. Brody's heart rate maintained and we were very hopeful things were headed in the right direction. Periodically throughout the afternoon they checked me and I was progressing. Slow and steady.  I was exhausted and wasn't able to get much rest, not to mention the fact that I was starving. I hadn't had anything, but ice chips since arriving at the hospital. As the evening progressed my contractions started getting more intense. I was actually needing to push the button for the extra kick of my epidural rather than the automatic doses it would give me. Finally, about 9:30pm it was show time and we were ready to push. I got out a couple of pushes and we stopped for a while. I was having a cramp like pain, so we hit the button for my kick of epidural and I laid on my side for about 30 minutes to try and get Brody to drop more, so I wouldn't exhaust myself by pushing for hours and hours. That seemed to do the trick because after about 30 minutes I was feeling a lot of pressure. During this time we were looking ok. Brody had a couple of dips in his heart rate and my blood pressure was falling occasionally. They had me on oxygen and we were back to pushing. For a while they had me lay on my side and push and then there were times they had me push every other contraction to give Brody a break. After I went a couple of rounds of both of us looking good we were back to pushing every contraction. I pushed and pushed for what seemed like forever and I will admit I got a little cranky with people in the room. I didn't yell at anyone I just got a bit snippy. For instance:

Trey: You're doing great Babe! Keep Going!
Amber: Oh, What do you know? You've never done this before!

Amber: It hurts. It hurts really bad.
Mom: I know
Amber: You don't know! You had C-sections!
(At which time Mom totally throws Stacy under the bus and tries to say she said it.)

Stacy: You're doing great! Is there anything I can get you? Wet rag? Ice chips?
Amber: Yes, you can get this head out of my vagina!

I pushed for what seemed like forever. His head seemed to be right there the whole time. By this time most of the epidural was gone and I was feeling quite a bit. If someone said "you're so close, he's right there" one more time I was going to explode. Finally, they brought in the on call Dr. to deliver and at this point I knew I was close. They NICU Dr's also started to arrive to get ready for Brody, but I didn't pay much attention. The only people I was concerned with at that time were the two people at the edge of the bed that were going to get this child out of me. I pushed about 4 or 5 more times and there he was. My baby boy was born at 11:26 p.m. weighing 5lbs 15 oz and measuring 19.8 in. They immediately took him to the baby bed and started cleaning him off and assessing him. I was calm, cool and collected and I remember telling my mom, "I just need to hear him cry." When he came out I know I heard him make whimpering sounds, but I was waiting for the real deal. Not long after that, I heard my baby cry and instantly began sobbing. I was so grateful that he was here and was doing ok. I couldn't see much of what was going on, but I knew he was in good hands. There was a rather large team of Dr's taking care of him. I started drinking some water because my mouth was so incredibly dry. I may have drank it too fast because it wasn't too long after that that I ended up throwing up. After about 20 minutes or so I heard one of the Dr's say, "Now let's get you wrapped up, so Mom can hold you before we leave." This was one of the greatest unexpected gifts every. I was told that there would be a chance they would take him without me getting to hold him, but because he was doing so well, I was going to get 5 minutes with my baby. He opened his eyes and looked at me and it was truly love at first sight. He was perfect!

It was time for him to make his way to NICU. One of the hardest things was watching them take my baby. I wanted nothing more than to see him and love on him, but our time together was so short. I handled it a lot better than I thought I would. It really helped knowing he was in good hands and so many people were dedicated to him. Trey and my sister made the journey with him and they immediately started running labs and scans to assess his heart. They got me cleaned and settled in a room at about 3:00 am and Trey came and joined me about 3:15. There wasn't going to be any where for Trey to stay with him and we were both exhausted. We knew we wanted to try and get some sleep so that we could join him first thing in the morning and try and get some insight about his heart. Again, there wasn't much sleep that was going to happen that night.

Tuesday, July 9

My nurse came and woke me up about 6:30 am to make me go to the bathroom. I was feeling really sore and swollen, so I opted for some pain meds. I didn't go back to sleep because I was anxious to get up so we could head over to the hospital to see Brody, so I was going to get through the day on no sleep. I ordered me some breakfast ate and quickly got ready. Trey wheeled me across to the hospital to the Cardiovascular Intensive Care Unit (CVICU) to get a good look at our baby. He was beautiful. We spent the morning with him and we had a few visitors. In the CVICU, you can only have 2 people by the bed side at a time, one of which being a parent, so that means Trey or I are there taking people to see him one at a time. That afternoon we headed back to my room to again try and get some sleep and head back to see him in the evening. Trey took a nice little nap, but I still was unable to sleep. We went back and saw him that night and things were looking good. They really couldn't tell us much about the heart because they were still running their tests and images and wanted to have the whole picture before talking with us.

 Wednesday, July 10 & Thursday, July 11

These days consisted of more imaging. Apparently all the different Dr.'s wanted their own pictures and were seeing things a little bit differently. They were constantly having discussions about what they saw and what they thought would be the best course of action. During the day, we were finally able to hold him. They had told us that because of the line they had going directly into an artery in his umbilical chord that we couldn't hold him because if that got damaged some how that it wouldn't be good. Our nurse carefully allowed each of us to hold him and it was awesome. It has been so hard to just stand and stare at our baby. We want so bad to hold him and love on him especially when he gets fussy.

By this time, you could tell that he was having to work really hard to breath and it broke my heart to see him struggle like that. He was still doing well enough to not need a breathing tube, but it broke my heart to see him like that. He was doing a lot of sleeping mainly because breathing was so exhausting. All along he had been being fed through fluids in his IV. We were working on teaching him about a bottle, so that after he recovered from surgery he would be a little familiar with what to do with it in when the time came, but again it took all his energy to breathe, so he really wanted nothing to do with the bottle. Finally, Thursday evening a surgical plan was developed and we got to meet and speak with the surgeon. It looked like his heart condition was a little better than they had thought it to be when I was pregnant. He has a small aortic arch which would prevent blood from going to the rest of the body. The plan was going to be to repair that by using tissue from the sac around the heart to replace the narrow section. He had a hole in the bottom chamber of his heart which would be patched up. His aortic valve seemed very small and would need to be replaced with a donor valve and his tricuspid valve was very leaky and would need to be assessed further before figuring out what to do. The plan for surgery would be to repair the aortic arch and the hole for sure and then examine and the aortic and tricuspid valve and if they could be repaired easily that would take place as well. I had been released that morning, so we had put our name on the list to stay in the Ronald McDonald House inside the hospital. We were on the waiting list for a room and didn't find out until 10:00 pm that we had a room. We finally got settled into bed about 11:30 pm and tried our best to get some sleep since they wanted us to be at Brody's bedside by 6 am.

Friday, July 12: Surgery Day

We woke up early after a restless night sleep. We were by Brody's bedside at 5:45 am and were waiting for the events of the day to begin. We got to spend some time with him and talked to a few of the Dr.'s. About 8:00am the anesthesiologist came and explained what they were going to do and we signed all the consent paperwork. A little while later it was time to go. We walked with him to the doors of the operating room tears streaming down my face. They allowed me one last moment before they wheeled him through the double doors. They assured me they would take good care of him. Another very difficult moment in my short time span as a parent, watching your 4 day old baby go off for open heart surgery. I was a mess. Trey and I both were. I can't even put it into words. We stopped outside the elevators and hugged each other and stared out the window to try and relax ourselves before joining the rest of our family in the waiting room. We got to the waiting room and again I lost it. I was so scared for my baby. I hated that he was having to go through all this. I felt so helpless. When we checked in at the front desk they gave us a pager, a lot like the ones you get at a restaurant when you are waiting for a table.  The pager would go off every hour and a half or so when someone was ready to give us an update. Our first update basically said he was under anesthesia and was stable. At our second update, they told us the incision had been made and the surgeon was taking more images of the heart from the inside and discussing his surgical plan again with other Dr.'s. Our third update said he had repaired the aortic arch and was looking at the aortic valve. The next update said he had opened the aortic valve (not replaced it) and he was closing the hole in the bottom chamber. The next update we were told he was assessing the tricuspid valve. Finally, at about 5:45p.m. we spoke with the surgeon. He confirmed everything he had done and was pleased with the way things had gone. He more so had temporary fixes for the aortic and tricuspid valves and wants to wait on surgically repairing those until he is bigger. The hope is that he will tolerate those fixes until he is about two or so (the longer the better). We still had about another hour and a half before we would be able to see him. Finally, we made our way up to see him and though they tried to prepare us for how he would look, nothing can really prepare you to see your baby like that. Brody was laying flat on his back with his mouth wide open. He had a breathing tube in his mouth and a million different wires all over. I couldn't do anything but cry. He was sedated and would be staying like that for days until he was better recovered. We only stayed about 10 minutes or so before we left. The nurse was really busy getting him settled in and set up and my heart was breaking the longer I stood there. We had a room at the Ronald McDonald House again and we were going to try and get some more sleep. When we got back to the room I sat on the edge of the bed and just cried. I hated seeing my baby like that. I hated how helpless I felt and how badly I just wanted to hold and comfort him.

These last few days on our road to recovery have been slow. Overall he seems to be doing well. He really isn't experiencing anything that wouldn't be expected. His heart seems to be functioning well and our problem has been fluid retention. After a major surgery like that the kidneys kind of shut down and take a break. They placed a catheter inside his belly to drain the fluid. He is being pumped with fluids to keep him hydrated and medicated, but the catheter isn't draining any of it. They replaced the catheter once with no change. They talked with the surgeon on Sunday and he wanted to come in and change it himself, so he did. The catheter seems to be in the right place now, but we are still having difficulty getting the fluid to drain. The biggest side effect with the fluid retention is that he is really puffy and swollen. His x-rays shows he has quite a bit of fluid around his lugs, but the good thing is he seems to be tolerating it well and they haven't had to adjust his breathing system. It has been a very slow process, but the Dr.s say he is headed in the right direction. Today, his kidneys have started coming around and he is producing urine. This is helping get rid of some of the fluid, but he still has a ways to go.

These last few days have been filled with so many different emotions. We have started coming home to sleep and getting up early to go to the hospital for the day. It is so hard to leave him at the hospital and come home. Every day I am filled with so much guilt. I know he has the best baby sitters there are and he is in good hands, but you can't begin to imagine how it feels to leave your sick baby half way across town. We have a number that we are able to call and talk to his nurse about how he is doing whenever we want. We call before going to bed and then we even set an alarm to call in the middle of the night to talk to his night nurse before the shift ends so we can hear directly how the night was going. Once he recovers from surgery, we will be able to move out of CVICU and into an actual room on the Heart Center floor. Here we will have a pull out bed and one of us will stay with him 24 hours a day. Once he has recovered from surgery the rest of his time in the hospital will be spent learning how to eat and such. They told us this can be one of the most long and stressful parts of the recovery process.

My emotions have been on over drive lately. I already mentioned the guilt I feel when I am not right by his side. When I am by his bed side I just feel completely helpless. There is nothing that I can do to make him feel better or anything. I have tried to throw all my energy into breast pumping because I feel like that is the one thing I can actually do for him.  I am having a really hard time seeing him in the condition that he is in. I hate seeing him all puffy and with so many wires. I was telling Trey today my fear that he doesn't know who we are and that he won't feel connected to us. I don't feel like I have had a real chance to bond with him and it breaks my heart. I also told Trey that I don't feel like a mom. I am trying  hard to stay strong for Brody, but the emotions, stress and sleepiness is a lot to handle. One thing that has helped us stay strong is all the love, support and prayers we have gotten from family, friends and strangers. We have received so many encouraging messages and they really have helped us through all this. Please continue to keep my new little family in your prayers. We are praying for strength and healing for our Brody.

Dear Brody

Dear Brody,

Tomorrow is the big day; we finally get to meet you! We have been praying for this day ever since the day we got married and I can't wait to hold you in my arms and press my cheek to yours. I remember when I first found out I was pregnant with you, your whole life played out in my mind. I imagined giving birth to you, bringing you home, your first step, your first day of school, your graduation, your wedding and even you becoming a parent yourself. I was instantly filled with so much excitement for everything you would bring to our lives. You haven't even entered this world yet, but yet you have brought us so much joy. I know your Daddy is anxiously waiting to share anything and everything sports related with you. I will tell you this though, it is completely up to you whether you call yourself a Packers fan or Texans fan. He has so much to teach you and I pray that you turn out to be just like him because he is amazing.

As a new family, we  have quite the journey ahead of us, but together we will get through it. We are a strong family of fighters that never quit and I know you will fit right in. When you get here, we need you to fight like hell (yes, Mommy said hell). I know the strength that you have because I have felt you kicking and moving around in my tummy for quite some time now and I pray that you recognize your strength early on. You are a precious gift from God and I can't wait to teach you about all His glory and everything He has shown us through you. There are so many people out there that have been talking to God about you and praying for you. From family and friends to complete strangers, you have enlightened so many people and shown them how wonderful our God is. You are a special baby boy and I will spend every breath I have making sure you always know that and thank God every day for the sweet blessing that you are.

I love you baby boy and can't wait to start our life together.

Love,
Mommy

The Countdown Begins

After spending 2 1/2 weeks in the hospital, we were finally released. It seemed that every time we got close to being released, our little guy would make things exciting again. I have been a little nervous being at home, but luckily this child is very active, so I know he is doing just fine in there. The doctor told me upon being released to make sure I do kick counts twice a day. I should feel him 6 times in an hour twice a day. He said to monitor this at times he is most active. For most babies this is right after eating. For me, he seems to be the most active right before I eat. He tends to go into a food coma after I eat. He is doing lots of twisting and turning which makes for some comedy as we sit and stare at my stomach as this wave rumbles across. Not to mention that my stomach remains lopsided most of the time because he hags out on one side of my stomach.

While in the hospital, we celebrated Trey's "un-official" Father's Day. Trey wasn't expecting any kind of gift especially since I had already been in the hospital for a while. Little did he know, I had purchased his gift back in March or April and had been saving it. One of the nights, he stayed with me I had my sister go to my house and get his gift and bring it to me on one of the nights she stayed with me. The look on his face was priceless. I bought him a Clay Matthews jersey that he had been wanting for a while. What made it even better was that I was able to buy a onesie size version. Now father and son will have matching jerseys for football Sunday. It's way too cute. To be honest, I didn't want to be left out and had to buy myself one as well. Now we can be a family of Clay Matthews' fans.

 

Like Father; Like Son

I had my doctor appointments today and overall things went well. His heart rate was good, his movement was good and things looked normal with me. I am 37 weeks now and our goal has been 39 weeks. We are scheduled to be induced on Monday July 8th if nothing changes before that point. The more I sit down and think about things the more my heart starts to race. I am realizing exactly how soon that will be here. This will be my last complete weekend at home (I am scheduled to check in Sunday the 7th), and all I really have is next week. I know time is going to just fly by. I have the normal first time mother anxiety over delivery and not knowing what to expect. At this point, my doctor is shooting for a natural delivery, but has made it very clear that if there is any sign of distress we go straight to the operating room for a c-section. I am ok doing whatever will get him here safely.

My real anxiety rests with everything after the delivery. The fear of the unkown. What I do know is that there will be a team of NICU doctors in the delivery room to assess him immediately after he is born. Depending on how he is doing determines if I will get to hold him before he is shuffled away. I know that after delivery he will be taken to the CVICU (Cardiovascular Intensive Care Unit) and Trey will get to go with him. There he will be assessed and within hours they will start examining his heart for a course of action. I keep mentally trying to prepare myself for the idea that he will be taken away and I don't know how long it will be before I am able to be by his side and touch and hold him. If I end up in a c-section I know this time frame will be extended. Trey will have the ability to Skype me the entire time he is with him, so I will have some sort of connection to what is going on with him. As I have said all along, I don't care what happens I just want him to be okay.

I am so excited to meet our little guy, but that excitement tends to get overshadowed with fear. It is at this point that our journey truly begins. Throughout this entire pregnancy we have put so much faith and trust in God and it's this connection that provides me with comfort. God has brought us this far and I know He will see us through our journey.

Center of Attention!

Things with Baby Bish have gotten exciting again! Tuesday I was scheduled for an ultrasound, non-stress test and OB appointment. I went for my ultrasound and baby looked great. He was wiggling, heart rate was good, there wasn't any fluid in his chest like before and he had grown. He was still measuring about 3 weeks off, but as long as he's growing we are good. I left the ultrasound and went down the hall for my non-stress test. Here they hook me up to monitors and listen to the heart rate, monitor contractions and document his movement. I had been there about 20 minutes and the nurse came in and had me roll to the side because he seemed to be sleeping. About 5 or 10 minutes later 2 nurses rushed in and started messing with his monitor. His heart rate had dipped for about a minute without correcting itself. Once he stabilized they called in a dr and after talking to my OB thy decided to send me for additional monitoring. I was on the monitor for another couple of hours and though his heart rate seemed stable they decided they were going to keep me overnight for monitoring. It was a rather uneventful night, but about lunch time on Wednesday Trey and I were sitting around and about 6 nurses rushed into the room.  They were turning me on my side, re-positioning me and putting me on oxygen to get his heart rate back up. They finally got things where they needed to be. Pretty scary. When my OB came by for rounds that evening he said they were going to keep me on continuous monitoring and wanted him to go 48 hours without a dip. Long story short we seem to be having dips every 12-18 hours. I had another echo of the heart today and overall things looked good there. No new issues and the heart was functioning normal. It's not a change in the heart that is causing the dip in hs heart rate. So at this point we are still supposed to go 48 hours so I will be on constant monitoring through the weekend. At this point I would rather just stay on the monitor the rest of the pregnency. There is no telling when his heart rate could dip and not come back up and if that happens at home when I'm not on a monitor it could be really bad. So being confined to the bed hooked up to monitors is where I will stay at this point. We are hoping and praying we can keep him in here as long as possible. The cardiologist is hoping we make it to 37 weeks (I'm 35 weeks tomorrow)to try a decrease respitory complications. Other than these sparatic dips, he is doing great. The doctors and nurses says he looks to be doing beautifully and is fine overall. So as always we are still asking for prayers for our little guy. We have a few more weeks on this part of the journey and once he's here it will be a whole new ball game.

Pursuit of Happiness

It is no secret that this hasn’t been the easiest of pregnancies. It has been filled with lots of anxiety, uncertainty and tears. Though physically I feel like it has been the easiest pregnancy ever (not that I have anything to compare it to), but emotionally and mentally it has been the craziest roller coaster ride. Recently, two very special ladies have given me some very special pregnancy memories that at the beginning of this journey I didn’t know if I would get to have.

First, our good family friend Heather, who grew up with us more like a sister, came into town to take some maternity pictures in-between taking finals and graduating from A&M with her nursing degree (If you listen real close, you can hear that whooping sound those Aggies like to make so bad).  It was a chance to be able to settle back and have some fun with the pregnancy and enjoy it. The pictures turned out beautiful and created a wonderful set of memories for us to look back on and remember the joy that this pregnancy has brought. Thank you Heather for this most special gift.

A few of my favorite

Secondly, my sister Stacy threw me an amazing baby shower. Back at the beginning when we were diagnosed with the Cystic Hygroma, I told her I didn’t want a baby shower because of all the uncertainties.  As the pregnancy progressed, things started to change. We were able to rule out genetic defects which was a huge hurdle and the Cystic Hygroma started to decrease (there isn’t anything there to measure anymore)! Though we are looking at quite a few issues with the heart and basically looking at heart reconstruction at this point, the Dr.s still seem hopeful that though it will be a long journey, it can be a successful one. We went and registered at Babies R US which was a little overwhelming. We don’t know exactly what we are looking at in terms of a hospital stay to know what size diapers to wear and what size clothes we will need, but overall it was fun to get to pick out some of the bigger items we know we will need. My shower was held this past Saturday and it was beautiful. There was green and yellow everywhere which are the colors of our nursery (and coincidently the colors of the Greenbay Packers).  We had a great turnout of family and friends and we received some really great gifts. It’s no secret this is going to be one spoiled little boy. It was a really pleasant day. I was worried leading up to it that I was going to be overwhelmed and emotional the whole time, but I wasn’t. It was a wonderful day full of happiness and joy. The topic of the day didn’t rest on complications or surgeries, but rather how big my belly has gotten. The whole day was another great way for me to sit back and enjoy my pregnancy. Thank you Stacy for an amazing shower full of so much love and excitement.

Both of these events have brought me so much joy and has made me even more excited for our little guy to get here. Thank you again ladies!

Crazy Couple of Days

This has been a whirlwind of a week, and it’s only Wednesday! Monday afternoon I had an appointment for a “basic” ultrasound to check his measurements and overall status of our baby. His measurements are still small, but he is still growing which was good news. The sonographer went to measure his Cystic Hygroma and she said there really wasn’t anything to measure there anymore! Yes! One thing to check off the list. When the Dr. came in to do his part of the ultrasound he was concerned at a new finding of fluid around the lungs. He confirmed and said that though it was a small amount of fluid it will still concerning because with all his heart troubles, this can be a sign of heart failure. He sent me down to Texas Children’s Hospital to have me admitted for observation and to start steroid shots for lung development. The steroid shots are intended for babies who are born prematurely because it helps mature the lungs to reduce the complications once they are born. If they examined his heart and found that it was in fact in great danger of failing they would need to deliver and the steroids would help decrease lung issues. This was really nerve racking and scary. We know that our baby needs to be in there as long as possible for his overall development, but primarily his brain development. Also, we don’t want to add on the complications of being premature with the complications he is already facing. They started me on the steroid shots late Monday night (you do 2 shorts 24 hours a part) and hooked me up to a monitor to check his heart rate. His heart rate was staying steady and they were going to be scheduling me an echo of the heart in the morning.

Needless to say I didn’t sleep very well, if at all, and anxiously awaited my echo appointment. They were able to fit me in at 9 in the morning on Tuesday with one of their fetal cardiologist (not the one I normally see). I was on the table for about 2 hours which isn’t much fun. Those tables aren’t very comfortable and I never know what they are looking at while they are actually doing the ultrasound. The Dr. completed the ultrasound, but said her next patient was there and waiting, so she would come to my room later for the consultation of the findings. More waiting. So much rested on these results and so it was very difficult to sit in a hospital room and just wait. Her day ended up getting very complicated and she was not able to get to me until 5 or 6 that evening. For the most part she had good news. She did not see any changes in his heart condition which was good. The one valve that they have never been able to find that slows down the flow of blood into the heart still wasn’t there, but the effects of it not being there were starting to be seen. She said it is common for those effects to show up about this stage in the pregnancy. She said that she only found a little fluid around one of the lungs (the original ultrasound showed it around both) and that our plan was still in place to keep him in there as long as possible. Sigh of relief.

I next had to wait for my OB to come by. He showed up shortly after and the cardiologist, but her report had not been finalized to where he could access it and review the results himself. We told him basically what we had been told and he re-assured us that they were going to keep him in there as long as possible. They were not going to panic and go to delivery just because they saw something that made them nervous. The only way they will take him out early is if his status greatly changes and his life is in danger if they don’t intervene. I felt so much better after talking to both these Drs. Because my second shot was scheduled for later that night and he didn’t have the report from the echo to review, we had to stay another night. At this point though, I was told I could lose the hospital gown and wear regular cloths. I have never been so excited to get to put underwear on in my life!

Wednesday was pretty uneventful. We basically had to wait for my OB to come by and see me and give me the game plan from here on out. He was able to finally come by around 3 to talk about everything. It looks like we will be adding more appointments to monitor his condition a little more closely. I will have 2 ultrasounds a week from here on out as well as a stress test some at the med center and some locally. I know I will have another echo scheduled next week, but do not know for sure the frequency that those will take place. These appointments won’t be so bad once school is out and I am not trying to coordinate things around work. At this point, I am really not given a say as to when these appointments are scheduled I just hope it doesn’t require me to miss too much school. Luckily, I work with amazingly supportive people and my students have been very supportive and cooperative as well.

Also, I have to give a big shout out to my sister. She came to the hospital and stayed the night with me Monday night, stayed with me all day Tuesday, left to go to her son’s baseball game, came back to stay the night with me Tuesday after the game and left for work from the hospital on Wednesday. I am so lucky to have her. Trey’s work schedule has been crazy this week, but he came and worked from the hospital each evening. With all the appointments we have had he is quickly running out of vacation days so we are trying to save his days as much as possible for when the baby actually makes his arrival. He is an amazing husband doing everything thing he can for me and our child.

With all this being said, please continue to pray for our little guy. Pray that he continues to grow, that his heart does not show further signs of complications and that he is able to stay in my belly as long as possible. I am always praying for the miracle that his heart condition improves and he has an easier treatment plan and recovery once he is here. As of right now, he is looking at the more complicated route of treatment where they basically reconstruct his heart. They will use things that are there to make things that aren’t there and he will not have a typical heart with all the same structures as everyone else. He would be looking at a much longer stay in the hospital of about 3-4 months. I have said all along, I don’t care what they have to do; I just want him to be ok. We are so blessed to have so many people praying for him and supporting us through all this. Words could not begin to be able to express our gratitude to everyone.

Here are the 3D pictures we were able to get at our ultrasound- 31 weeks

Hello Third Trimester

Entering the third trimester has really brought a wave of excitement and sense of reality that things are getting close. We have increased our number of doctor appointments to the point where I am in some kind of office every week (if not multiple offices).

At our last ultrasound we got some new information. We found out that the baby has a dilated kidney. It really looks quite large compared to the other one. They told us that when the baby is born they will do a couple of tests to see why the kidney is dilated and determine from there how they will need to proceed. The problem can either be fixed with antibiotics or might require surgery.

All along the baby has measured about a week behind. As of the last ultrasound, he is now measuring about 2 weeks off. The good thing is that we have already ruled out chromosomal abnormalities with the amnio we did a few months ago. The issue could be tied to one of his complications or it could just mean that he will be on the small side. The big thing we need to do at this point is monitor to make sure he is still growing.  It’s ok if he grows a little slower, but if he stops completely that is a problem.  They won’t check his measurements for another 2 weeks, so we have to keep praying that he grows.

They continue to measure his cystic hygroma. They don’t even mention it anymore which is a good sign. I usually forget to ask about it because I get so side tracked with everything else, but I make a point while they are doing the ultrasound to look at the measurement. It is still continuing to decrease in size which is awesome. I am hoping that it completely goes away by the time he is born so we can cross that off our to-do list.

They have started monitoring his lungs (maybe they have all along, but we have talked about it at his last 2 appointments). During the ultrasound they watch his diaphragm to make sure it inflates once in a 30 minute period. This shows that the lungs are functioning and practicing for life on the outside. At this last ultrasound they were having trouble getting the shot they needed. They had me rotate a couple of different ways and they had this sound zapper that didn’t phase him at all. We had about 4 minutes to go and I was getting really nervous. Finally in that last moment, they saw the diaphragm inflate. Talk about a sigh of relief. Seems like he is a bit of a procrastinator like his Daddy. I don’t know what that would have meant for us at this point, but glad that was one less thing to worry about right now.

The doctor has told me to monitor his movements and make sure I feel him at least 10 times in 2 hours. This normally is not an issue for him. We know all along how much he likes to move and dance around in there, but there is just a little added stress to know I have to keep such a close eye and count. Normally I can sit down and count 10 kicks in a matter of 15 minutes. I will continue with these ultrasounds every week until he is born to monitor his growth and make sure organs are functioning properly.

I also had my first appointment with my new OB at Texas Children’s. Trey and I both really liked him. He gave us a lot of good information and made us feel really comfortable. He said that he usually likes to induce his patients at 39 weeks, so that things can be as organized and planned as possible which I am completely ok with. My OB appointments at this point are going to be every two weeks. On a side note, my new OB reminds me of Steve Carell. When I look at him that’s all I seem to focus on; my baby is going to be delivered by the 40 year-old virgin. It kinda makes for a less stressful appointment in my head.

I go back for my echo of the heart on Monday. I don’t know for sure how often we will be going for those, but I only have a month left of school and then I won’t be as concerned about appointments because I won’t have to worry about scheduling them around work. My schedule of appointments sounds a bit stressful, but at the same time they make me a little excited. I like that I get to check on him every week now and it makes me excited to know that all these appointments means he is that much closer to being here. With the excitement come the nerves. I am excited that he is so close to being here, but very nervous because at the same time, once he is here it is go time. That’s when everything starts happening and decisions about care really start being made and surgeries and treatments begin.

We continue to pray for his protection and healing. God has brought us so far with our little one and we know that he will continue to guide us through this process. Please continue to keep Baby Bish in your prayers. They have done so much for us thus far and continue to provide us a tremendous amount of comfort.

Baby Bish at 28 weeks